Satire by Eric Curl
March 23, 2024 – The lobbyist group behind Little Free Libraries (LFL) shut the book on a proposed state ban on “communism in a box.”
Known as “Big Little”, the powerful lobbyist group blocked Georgia lawmakers’ attempt to prohibit the LFL from disbursing free reading materials that have not yet been vetted by the Appropriate Selection Standards Enforcement Solicitors (ASSES) – a process that involves submerging the books in water to see if they float.
State lawmakers say they will not give up their attempt to protect residents from the scourge of subversion throughout Savannah.
“They shouldn’t have to worry about their child being exposed to Shel Silverstein while walking the dog,” said one legislator.
Fortunately, it appears the less influential American Library Association will fail in its attempt to thwart legislation that prohibits local and state governments from accepting grants and materials from the satanic blood sucking cult.
“Libraries may be silent, but they’re deadly,” as one lawmaker put it.
In related news, legislators will no longer hold first and second “readings” to pass bills. Instead, the bills will be “streamed.”
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