Satire by Eric Curl
Feb. 22, 2026 – A local atheist was delayed from his day-drinking Sunday, after forgetting it was Black Sabbath and all of the parking spaces were reserved for members of the Church of Satan. After finally finding a space inconveniently located nearly three blocks away from his favorite watering hole (following 10 minutes of searching!), the man angrily confronted church goers about their “parking privileges.”
However, the church members were so welcoming, he soon felt a kinship with his onetime foes. After hearing a brief summary of their beliefs (life should be tax free), he learned there was something bigger than himself and he decided to put down the bottle for good. From then on out, he would dedicate his life to the ‘Prince of Darkness.”
“My car will belong in those holy spaces from now on,” the man happily proclaimed.
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Art by Julia Licht
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