Satire by Eric Curl

Sept. 29, 2024 – Plunged into darkness due to power outages caused by Hurricane Helene, city residents were astonished by the presence of rarely seen pinpoints of light emanating from the nighttime sky these past few days.

“I’ve heard of so-called stars before and have seen some images on Instagram, but I have to admit I was a bit skeptical,” one resident said. “Now to see them in person, my faith in what I read on the Internet has been restored. Those online images really don’t do them justice though.”

Many others reported the discovery of dust covered “printed” materials known as “books” after the loss of Wi-Fi capabilities sent them on a maddening search for ways to spend their time. With the gentle hum of generators and chainsaws in the distance, the long-forgotten pastime of “reading” was embraced.

Meanwhile, at least one local blogger who spends way too much time on his computer was relieved to find he could still communicate with his neighbors in person, even without emojis. (He did give what could be considered an unnaturally high number of thumbs ups.)

Read more Savannah Illustrated>

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